Letting Go Of Fear And Learning How To Self-Promote

BY JAQUELINE DAVIDSON KOPITO

As an identical twin myself, I always wanted to write a book about twins which I’ve finally done with Twintastic, my new fiction book for tweens and twins.

Writing Twintastic was an amazing process. There were days I would sit at the computer from first thing in the morning and not leave until late in the evening—when a writer gets into the zone there is no stopping. Other days, I would write for a while and then pace around the house or throw in a load of laundry, and then try again to finish a sentence, paragraph, page, or chapter. Next to my bed I always kept a pad and pen, and I would carry them with me as well, never knowing when an idea would hit (I’m a little bit old school that way). Even though at times, working on the manuscript could be frustrating and all-consuming, I truly enjoyed the journey. 

After finding a publisher willing to publish my book, I was beyond ecstatic. Fast forward, after more editing and rewrites, the book was finally done. Then, the publisher told me I had to help with promoting the book once it came out. At the time, I didn’t think much about it, and these days it’s very common to help publishing houses with promoting your book. I thought to myself that I had a few contacts and that I would send out a few emails and things would fall into place. This wouldn’t be a big deal. I could not have been more wrong. To say I had no idea what I had gotten myself into is an understatement! 

The few contacts I thought I had, disappeared. I quickly realized that I had to start my next journey: Promoting myself and the book! The thought of this made me anxious, and more anxious, and I wasn’t quite sure how I was going to do this, but I knew I had to leave my comfort zone. It was then that I realized I had to become an entrepreneur, someone with a business and marketing strategy, and the courage to keep moving forward and hustling, taking on challenges and not giving up.

I had to find an audience who would be interested in me and my book. In order to do so, the first thing I did was to hire someone to build me a website. Next, I went on practically every social media and began the process of creating content and trying to build a community. I had to go full force and collaborate with people, find podcasts and radio shows that would have me on as a guest, and reach out to newspapers, magazines, schools and book stores. I figured I’d have to live and breathe my book to be recognized; otherwise, Twintastic was just going to lie dormant on Amazon.

I wasn’t on any social media platforms except for Facebook, on which I hardly engaged. Basically, I posted once a year during the holidays with a family picture, but since I was familiar with Facebook, I began with a Facebook Author page. I then went on and joined Instagram and LinkedIn. I quickly learned about each media culture with the help from my two sons, both of whom are in college. They didn’t think getting onto social media was a big deal and weren’t quite sure why I was freaking out. Obviously, my boys are from a completely different generation. 

Joining these social media platforms wasn’t such a big deal after all. I quickly connected with many people. The hard part was putting myself out there and posting. I then had to get myself to trust my instincts and value my efforts.

I decided my first post would be something simple and sweet about sisterhood. Do you know what happened next? Not much. I mean sure, some friends commented, but overall, nothing really happened. I tried a few more times with some cute pictures and again, not much happened.

I told myself that if I was going to promote myself, I couldn’t be scared and concerned about what anyone else thought. I had to show my emotions and put myself out there, really put myself out there. I started writing from my heart and posting on LinkedIn. Then, I started doing videos with my twin sister, Amy, and posting stories on Facebook and Instagram. I even started a YouTube channel and posted more videos. Before I knew it, I was having fun. I let go of my fears and inhibitions. As I started getting more likes on my posts, and even some nice comments, I couldn’t wait to create my next post.

I kept on adjusting and re-adjusting my plans and reaching out to more and more people. Growing my network wasn’t going to happen overnight, I knew I had to be patient and only think positively. I wasn’t going to let myself get down because some radio host I’d never even heard of wasn’t interested in me. There are days that I would send ten emails, and only get one response. I didn’t take it personally, kept moving forward, and will continue to do so. As a result, I’ve now participated in many Zoom conferences during which I’ve met some incredible people from all over the world, as far away as Egypt. I’m welcoming every opportunity that comes my way and building relationships that are important to me.

I’ve come to realize that I’ve learned a lot about myself over the last few months. I’ve grown and evolved, to the point that I feel unstoppable. I like to think of myself as a hard driving, entrepreneurial, businesswoman. I’ve come to enjoy the hustling. Promoting myself and my book is a process that I’ve come to appreciate. Some days it’s a grind, but overall, I love it. It allows me to expose a previously hidden part of my identity which I’ve come to find incredibly fulfilling. I’m thankful for all my opportunities and look forward to new experiences, and if I sell some books, that would be great too!

ABOUT JAQUELINE DAVIDSON KOPITO

Jacqueline Davidson Kopito received a B.A. from Syracuse University and a Master’s in Corporate and Public Communications, with honors, from Seton Hall University.  She has written numerous articles for TWINS Magazine, the Chicken Soup for the Soul series, and local newspapers. TWINTASTIC is her first fiction book for tweens.

An identical twin herself, when Jacqueline is not binge-watching Netflix, talking to her sisters (and Mom & Dad), practicing qi gong, or rooting for the NY Rangers, she loves talking and writing about all things twin related.

Jacqueline lives in Short Hills, New Jersey with her husband and her two boys.